Lawyer And Blonde
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from Los Angeles to New York.
The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game.
The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
The lawyer persists and explains that the game is really easy and a lot of fun. He explains” I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5, and vice-versa.”
Again, she politely declines and tries to get some sleep.
The lawyer, now somewhat agitated, says, “Okay, if you don’t know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don’t know the answer that you’ll ask me, I will pay you $500!.”
Figuring that since she is a blonde that he will easily win the match. This catches the blonde’s attention and, figuring that there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. “What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?”
The blonde doesn’t say a word, reaches in to her purse, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the lawyer.
Now, it’s the blonde’s turn. She asks the lawyer: “What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?” The lawyer looks at her with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references.He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the Net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends E-mails to all his coworkers and friends he knows. All to no avail. Afterover an hour, he wakes the blonde and hands her $500.
The blonde politely takes the $500 and turns away to get back to sleep.
The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, “Well, so what IS the answer!?”
Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5, and goes back to sleep.
Top 20 Dumb Blonde Jokes
1. Why do blondes have square boobs?
No one told them to take the tissues out of the box first.
2: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
Pregnant.
3. Did you hear about the blondes who froze to death at the drive-in?
They went to see “Closed for the Winter”.
4. What was the blonde psychic’s greatest achievement?
An in-body experience!
5. What did the dumb blonde say to the doctor when she found out she was pregnant?
“Are you sure it’s mine?”
6. Why are there so many dumb blonde jokes?
It gives brunettes and redheads something to do on Saturday night.
7. How do you get a dumb blonde to marry you?
Tell her she’s pregnant.
8. How do dumb blonde braincells die?
Alone.
9. What is the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot?
A number of people claim to have seen a Bigfoot.
10. What do you get when you offer a blonde a penny for her thoughts?
Change.
11. What do you call a blonde surrounded by drooling idiots?
Flattered.
12. Where does a blonde hemophiliac go for medical treatment?
An acupuncturist.
13. Did you hear about the blonde lesbian?
She kept having affairs with men.
14. Why do blondes drive VW’s?
Because none of them can spell Porsche.
15. How do you confuse a blonde?
You don’t — they’re born that way.
16. How many blondes does it take to play tag?
One.
17. What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
Run like hell — she’s got a hand grenade in her mouth!
18. What does an intelligent blonde and a UFO have in common?
No matter how often you hear about them, you never see one.
19: What do you call a blonde with a 50 I.Q.?
Gifted.
20. What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet?
Last year’s hide and seek champion.
The Blonde and Brunette
A blonde and a brunett where on ther way to heaven and the brunette asked the blonde “how did you die” ?
The blonde said “I had a heart attack, how about you”
And the brunette says “I froze to death, what caused your heart attack”
The blonde said “It started when I came home from work and I saw a womans car in the drive way”
“I rushed in to the house and asked my husband where are you hiding her”
“He said hiding who, but I started looking around the house, I was so angry I dropped to the floor.”
Finally the brunette says “Damn!! If you had just looked in the freezer we’d both have lived.
