Wishes of rabbit and bear
One day, down in the mystical forest, a magical frog is hopping towards a water hole. The forest is so enormous that the frog have never laid eyes on another animal before. But today, by chance a bear is chasing after a rabbit to have for dinner.
The frog called for the two to stop and said, “Because you are the only two animals I have seen, I will grant both of you three wishes. Bear, you can go first.” The bear thought for a moment, and being the male he said, “I wish for all the bears in this forest, apart from me, to be female.”
For his wish, the rabbit asked for a crash helmet, and immediately put it on. The bear is amazed at the stupidity of the rabbit, wasting his wish like that.
It’s the bear’s second turn for a wish. “Well, I wish that all the bears in the next forest are female as well.”
The rabbit asked for a motorcycle and immediately hopped on it and roared the engine. The bear is shocked that the rabbit is asking for such idiotic items, because after all, he could have asked for money and bought the bike.
For the last wish the bear thought for a while and then said, “I wish that all the bears in the world, apart from me, are female.”
The rabbit grinned, roared the engine, and said, “I wish that this bear is gay.”
The Atheist
One beautiful morning a atheist was walking through the forest, admiring natures surroundings…
He looked up and saw the trees swaying in the wind high above him and smiled…
He saw the river glisten in the sun twinkle like a new born star and it made him warm inside…
He thought to himself that mother nature had made a true and wonderful world…
The atheist had walked a little further down the track he had taken when suddenly a bear jumped out of the bushes only a few yards ahead of him and started growling, looking hungry and ran quickly towards him…
Seeing the big bear bounding towards him he screamed in horror and started running as fast as he could away from the bear…
Knowing that the bear would catch up to him and he had no chance, the athiest soon ran out of breath and in a few paces fell to the ground…
As the bears shadow fell upon his face and his paws come down upon his chest, the atheist screamed “Oh help me, God!”
Suddenly the trees that he so much admired stopped swaying…
The river he loved suddenly stopped flowing..
And the sky opened up and a voice begun to speak..
“I am God, and even though you dont believe in Me, I am here for every being on this earth”
The atheist felt relieved a little bit and asked God…”Im sort of in this situation, Im only asking if You can help me get out of it”
God thought for a moment and said…”I will give you one wish to help you and that is all, you may proceed with this wish”
The atheist thought about this wish for a moment and then spoke to god..” Well i dont really want to become a christian, so I wish the bear to become a christian”
God spoke…”So be it done”
Suddenly the sky closed up…
The river turned back into its flowing glory…
The trees began to sway again…
And the bear clapped his paws together and said…”Thankyou God for this meal Im about to receive”
The campers and the bear
Two campers are walking through the woods when a huge brown bear suddenly appears in the clearing about 50 feet in front of them.
The bear sees the campers and begins to head toward them.
The first guys drops his backpack, digs out a pair of sneakers, and frantically begins to put them on.
The second guys says, “What are you doing? Sneakers won’t help you outrun that bear.”
“I don’t need to outrun the bear,” the first guy says. “I just need to outrun you.”
