Blind Man
A nun in the convent walked into the bathroom where mother superior was taking a shower.
“There is a blind man to see you,” she says.
“Well, if he is a blind man, than it does not matter if I’m in the shower. Send him in.”
The blind man walks into the bathroom, and mother superior starts to tell him how much she appreciates him working at the convent for them.
She goes on and on and 10 minutes later the man interrupts: “That’s nice and all, ma’am, but you can put your clothes on now. Where do you want me to put these blinds?
The stupid wives
An Irish man, an English man and a Scottish man are in a bar discussing how stupid their wives are when the English man says, “You know, my wife must be the most stupid woman on this planet. There was a sale down at the supermarket last week and she bought $300 worth of meat, but we don’t even have a freezer.”
The Scotsman says, “That’s nothing. My wife went out last week and bought a brand new car for $8000, and she can’t even drive.”
The Irishman says, “You think that’s stupid? I went home last week and my wife told me that she’d booked herself a two week holiday in the Caribbean. I watched her packing her case and she took nearly 400 condoms with her, and she doesn’t even have a penis…”
The Buffalo Theory
The “Buffolo Theory” of Beer..
A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first.
This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.
In this way regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.
That’s why you always feel smarter after a few beers, and that’s why beer is so GOOD for you!
